Written by churchmouse

Saturday, 30 October 2010

image for Coleen Rooney to open plumber's merchants.
a tap yesterday

The wife of the England striker Wayne Rooney has announced that she intends to open a new plumber's merchants in the Cheetham Hill district of Manchester.

The new shop is expected to provide the usual array of gold plated taps, designer radiators, and exclusive lavatory bowls needed by today's busy sanitary engineer.

It is believed that Mrs Rooney had been looking for an outlet for her energy, during the times that her husband is at work.

A close friend - Bev Moneybagchav said: "With the current financial crises affecting everyone, Coleen needed to find an additional source of income to help with the family budget".

Business/celebrity experts are not surprised by the move, as it is well known that Mrs Rooney has had a long term interest in domestic water and waste management. The head of the British Guild of Sanitary product retailers said "We have been waiting for something like this to happen for a while now, although had we been approached we may have advised her to set up in a different location".

As a promotional incentive, a gift of a free hacksaw and a packet of wire-wool is being offered to every plumber that opens a trade account with Mrs Rooney during the next 10 days.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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