15 Found Dead In 'Ghastly House Of Horror'

Funny story written by Nick Hobbs

Monday, 26 July 2010

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A doctor, today.

Police have uncovered a grisly 'house of death' in Swansea, informants tell us.

News is sketchy at this time, but around 15 dead bodies, some seemingly mutilated, were found at an address by a member of the public.

"Officers were called to the address earlier this afternoon," we were told by police spokesman Bob Trundle, "my men were met by a disturbing scene, each body was laid out on cold slabs, some had been cut open and sewn back together again."

"Pathologists are looking into the fact that some internal organs may have been removed," he continued "and the heartless bastard even tagged a toe on each victim. I have never seen anything of the like, although it has made identification a lot easier."

"We have a man in custody, a Dr. Roger Tarbuck, or Dr Death as the lads are calling him!" he said with a chuckle.

We managed a quick word with Dr Tarbuck as he was escorted from the scene, he was heard to shout "It's a f#@ing morgue you idiots!! A MORGUE!! I have a licence and everything...check the register..."

Records do show that a morgue once sat on this site, and has never officially closed or had it's licence revoked, but the police seem quite sure about what they're doing, so it must be OK.

Officers on scene are being given treatment for shock plus free coffee and doughnuts. They are also excluded from prosecution should anything come to light later which may harm their defence.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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