Written by Skoob1999

Thursday, 1 July 2010

image for No Comment Offered On England World Cup Squad Internal Warfare
Sisters - This Might Not Strike A Cord Now - But Give It Two Weeks. Then You'll Get It.

Following the publication of certain 'rumours' alleging that the England World Cup squad was a party divided by loyalties relating to one side or another of the allegedly warring factions, centred around two prominent squad members, Skoob News set out to determine the truth.

Because of a gagging order, enforced until such time as Fabio Capello's future is decided, we can't really say TOO much.

We tried, but nobody was spilling the beans on the record.

So we looked off the record. Surprise, surprise. Once again, sexual impropriety, gross hypocrisy, and overpaid tossers who let the nation down became a recurrent theme, but we were sworn to keep it off the record. So Skoob News will honour that undertaking. (Like fuck we will!)

Sadly, we can only hint at what we've heard. And pose questions to the good citizens of England. Such as:

- Why were Asley Cole and Ledley King laughing their arses off a mere four hours after the England team were humiliated?

- Why did the England back four play like strangers?

- Why, as often happened in all the games, when an England player was put under pressure, did certain team-mates appear to turn a blind eye?

- Why did our world class, star striker barely get as much as a sniff of the football?

- Why did the team Captain appear on TV at a press conference stating that he and a group of senior players "intended to challenge the coach? And if it offends certain players, so be it"?

- Why did he then clam up?

- What was all that about?

Here at Skoob News, we think we know, according to received information from our mate, Dave. We reckon we're right on the money with this one. But we can't make it public until the gagging order is lifted.

What we can say though is:

It's a national disgrace. These overpaid, under performing priapic egomaniacs should never be allowed to sully our country again.

They should fuck off to Real Madrid with Cristiano Ronaldo and co.

Like the frauds they are.

More when they let us reveal it.

Talk about sisters...

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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