London - (Foot-in-Mouth): The Prime Monster worked hard on his compassionate side today after inadvertently comparing a Lancashire woman pensioner to Bigfoot, the notorious American yeti, yesterday.
Campaign staff deliberately left his microphone on today as Brown cooed sweet asides and lavished compliments on Halesowen voters following live earlier TV coverage.
Meanwhile back in Rochdale Mrs Gillian 'Bigfoot' Duffy has fought off tabloid offers for an exclusive amid reports she could make £250,000 in compensation for the slur on her character.
The last time a public figure unfairly compared someone to the sasquatch was back in George W Bush's 1996 stateside campaign when the Texas governor called rivals 'throwbacks', missing links and spawn of the chupacabra.
Cryptozoologists are watching tonight's UK televised debate between the three prime monsterial wannabes with great interest.
