Supermarket to offer Value range legal stuff

Funny story written by bubblyian

Thursday, 22 April 2010

image for Supermarket to offer Value range legal stuff
Divorce? Great! Go to aisle 17.

Following the changes in the Legal Services Act allowing anyone to offer legal services, a supermarket has launched their new Value Legal services.

Saying they guarantee to 'undercut any law firm in the country', they offer for example: "sue one get one free" on their discount pack for the small claims courts, pre-completed Wills leaving everything to your favourite Superstore, Apple PI's for the Personal Injury department - guaranteed satisfaction or your money back within 7 days.

In their special 'Family Selection', they have 'do-it-yourself' Birth Certificates in small (no father named), medium (one father-named), and large (2-or more additional adults named).

Save money on the whole family by using the 'Family Pack' - A set of 5 Residence and Contact Orders, pre-completed with your choice of zero, alternate weekends or shared residence arrangements, with the father's name blank so that each child can have a different father's name.

A spokesman said,"We are delighted with the new range of Legal forms. These are at a massive discount to the normal High Street Law firms and we are sure that nobody will notice the difference. We are offering Judges Club-card points for every Legal form that they find is valid."

His Honour Judge Les Beavingem said, "I am delighted with this store's attempts to bring down the cost of litigation by offering this value range. I look forward to moving my Court to my local Superstore shortly."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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