Katie Price: I'm With Nick Clegg

Funny story written by Hartley

Tuesday, 20 April 2010


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image for Katie Price: I'm With Nick Clegg
Price pledges Team Price vote in exchange for Clegg's face in marriage pics

Global super-boob, Katie Price, has exclusively revealed her latest-must-know political and personal intentions.

Speaking in Egypt at her daily Price conference Katie announced, "I can EXCLUSIVELY reveal I've had enough of Alex and will be ditching him in favour of that Nick Clegg."

Taking a break from her second honeymoon of 2010 to make the shock announcement Price continued, "I married Alex after he won Big Brother because I thought it'd make me popular again, but it ain't worked. I ain't had a headline for weeks and the magazines don't seem interested in my story anymore. I don't even get spoofed as much as I used to."

Adjusting her tiara and gold tutu the 31 year old mum of three disclosed, "I've decided I need a change in sidekick. I saw Nick Clegg was trending on Twitter, had a look at him and decided he'd be the perfect candidate to play the groom at my summer wedding/blessing. He'll draw more money off the magazines for the pictures than Alex, and he'd definitely do a better speech for the DVD."

When asked by a weary journalist if she was aware Mr. Clegg is happily married with three children an unfazed Price said dismissively, "Details, details. I'll guarantee him the full Team Price vote in the General Election in return for him getting divorced in four weeks. I won Big Brother for Alex, and I'll win the General Election for Clegg. I told you all before - never underestimate the THE Pricey!!! Woo- hoo!!!"

A source close to Ms. Price said, "Alex only got 200,000 viewers for his new show The Tights Of My Life. Katie finally had to accept he's not the career changing investment she thought he was. She's really missing the Pete factor, and hopes that Clegg will get Jordan back where she belongs and in the money. Katie is determined this wedding/ blessing will make a profit. She's really worried the whole thing could turn into a complete fiasco."

Alex Reid was last seen in Egypt being dismantled for shipment back to his manufacturer for recycling.

Nick Clegg was very wisely unavailable for comment on this particular issue.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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