Waiter dragged to his death in lobster tank

Funny story written by mickrikko

Friday, 26 February 2010

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Police and Coroners are investigating reports that a waiter was dragged into a lobster tank by one of the incumbent crustaceans. Derek Cheese, owner of Le Grande Fromage restaurant in Scarborough played down suggestions of killer lobster attack, suggesting the young waiter had fallen into the tank, and is perfectly alright, but eyewitness statements tell quite a different story.

"One minute he was asking me to select one of them, and the next one of the little buggers swam up and seized him by the tie. He was pulled under," explained one diner.

Sheila Munter, from one of those lesser known animal welfare societies that live for this kind of stuff, commented "It serves him right doesn't it? I mean if you keep animals at all, for any reason, or use them, or eat them, or even look at them, then this kind of thing is bound to happen.'

Mr Cheese remains unmoved, and pledges to re-open the restaurant tonight, complete with killer lobsters, "I told you, he's alright, his shift starts in half an hour," he explained.

The fate of the lobster is as yet undecided.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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