Written by Earl Grey

Tuesday, 23 February 2010

image for Gordon Brown Admits "I Studied Leadership At The Putin Academy"
Gordon Brown in the uniform of the Putin Academy

The bullying row continued at 10 Downing Street yesterday as Gordon Brown denied being a bully. He has, however, admitted to attending a short course in leadership at the Putin Academy, Moscow. "I attended for a week. I am not a full time student there. I found their methods interesting" was all he would say.

The Putin Academy is world famous and has graduates throughout the world. It was started by a former KGB enforcer who was looking at ways to expand his slush fund. The Academy is known for its controversial ideas. For example, its foreign policy course concentrates on sending in special forces to murder and mutilate neighbouring states who disagree with you.

The domestic policy course is even less moderate, with role plays on arresting all gays, shooting foreigners and torturing dissidents. The economic policy course examines ways to starve your own population in order to get rich.

Professor Stig O'Treacy of the Athlone Polotical Theory School said "If Brown has been exposed to these ideas, even for just a week, he could be seen to be a bully."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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