British Royal Harpist Has Jail Sentence Dropped

Funny story written by Bureau

Monday, 4 January 2010

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A former British royal harpist, who performed at the wedding of Prince Charles, walked free from court on Friday after being given a community order for handling stolen goods and attempted fraud.

Apparently, the Prince himself had put in a good word for her.

"I feel sorry for Ms. Phelps", stated Prince Charles. "She has been battling a drug addiction and Camilla and I observed her trying to fly while playing her harp. Sad, you know?"

Jenny Phelps, 29, the only musician to play at Charles's wedding to second wife Camilla Parker Bowles in 2005, had been accused of burgling houses while battling a very serious drug addiction.

But the Royal College of Music graduate was convicted of the lesser charge of handling stolen goods, taken by her ex-boyfriend and heroin addict William Scott.

The court ruled that Scott had led Ms. Phelps away by promising that she didn't have to jump off tall chairs to fly with her harp but as soon as they got the drugs, he would teach her how to fly off a steep cliff while plucking.

"He had even made a set of wings for her to wear, the devil", stated her attorney.

The court had heard how Phelps had been hooked on heroin at the time of the offenses.

But Judge David McIntire heard that she had made a "complete transformation" after staying clean for four months. In fact, her social worker stated that she was a complete angel.

That seemed to bring a far away look into Phelps eyes.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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