Written by Earl Grey

Friday, 17 April 2009

image for Scottish Meals On Wheels Scandal
A Fucking Blue Van

A mmeals on wheels service is the centre of a storm tonight. A Scottish firm who claim that they provide tasty, fresh meals to the elderly have been caught out supplying Sainsbury's ready meals.

Gordon Scottish, the well known headchef said "Fuck it. I can't be arsed cooking for a buch of vermin. Just get any old shit and shovel it in them. We deliver it in a fucking van So what do they fucking expect? Value for money? Fuck off."

Mr Scottish is thought to be very rich as a result of running the meals on wheels service. However, he is not really doing any of the catering. Instead he uses a range of ready meals prepared by rival chef Jamie Mockney.

Unfortunately Mr Mockney was available for comment "I think it's not pukka. And neither does Jules. It's just so not pukka. A bit like me, really."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!





Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
50 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more