A sad ectoplasmic Victorian serving maid today started haunting a large shopping centre in the Midlands after failing to get any reaction in Primark.
The large, busy and very impersonal store was built on the grounds of an ancient Indian burial site before being converted to a Victorian Asylum, which was razed to the ground in 1823.
The sad ghost of the lunatic serving maid has haunted the ground since the fire, notably scaring workmen in 1972. However, after the Primark store was built in 2007 the maid has failed miserably in her mission to haunt the store.
Speaking through a medium, the maid said,"I used to waft the changing room curtains with an icy gust, but I just got screamed at to keep the hell out by tatooed women with kids in pushchairs. Then the woman in charge pushed trolleys of clothes through me at great speed every day. It was no better in the shop, every time I materialised I was directed to the "goth section" and once I was called a sad weirdo."
It seems the final straw was being followed by the security man who tried to arrest the ghost for "loitering without buying."
Security guard,Sam Plank, said," I'm sick of these young girls coming in looking to nick stuff, why can't they just bloody buy it, it's only £2.50 an item anyway, it's cheaper than a charity shop in here."
The ghost commented,"Screw Primark, the queues are horrendous anyway and even the customers can walk through their clothes."
