London Taxi Fires Explained

Written by Dr Will C U Now

Friday, 19 September 2008

image for London Taxi Fires Explained
Professor Hugh Jarse examining a taxi's bullshit converter.

Top UK scientist Professor Hugh Jarse was today able to reveal the mysterious cause of recent black cab fires in London.

"After extensive research and interviews with drivers I can now reveal the cause of the hitherto unexplained events." said Professor Jarse.

"Taxis with the TX4 branding were fitted with an unusual catalytic converter that could also process bigoted views as spouted by your average London cabbie and convert them into the views of a reasonable person. The cabs that exploded were exposed to over ten times the usual dosage of bullshit causing a catastrophic malfunction in the converter that manifested itself in a fiery inferno." continued the professor.

Taxi drivers across London were busy being retrained to be a little more tolerant in other people and cultures although, it is believed to be an almost impossible task.

"Gor blimey guv'nor" said one driver "I was midway through a rant about east europeans when I could see smoke coming from under me hood. I shut up and started to say things like 'I enjoy aspects of their culture and they were adding to the exciting diversity that is London and the smoke quickly disappeared."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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