Britons must stop wasting food in an effort to help combat rising living costs, Gordon Brown has said en route to the G8 summit in Japan.
A Cabinet Office study on food policy reveals that the average UK household throws away £8 of leftovers a week.
John Prescott was unavailable for comment as he was in the toilet throwing up a £25 Lobster Thermador, £15's worth of finest french Foie Gras and a £80 portion of Almas caviar.
Our reporter over heard the Russian President Dmitry Medvedev saying: "Xе хас иссуэс тхе fot bаsтарD". We are not entirely sure what he meant but believe it has something to do with fat men having issues.