Heathrow protesters take their case to Hermann Goring

Funny story written by matwil

Thursday, 3 July 2008

image for Heathrow protesters take their case to Hermann Goring
The Lufwaffe hits the Heathrow site

Protesters against the building of Heathrow's third runway have taken their case to German air chief Hermann Goring.

The demonstrators, sporting t-shirts with the slogan 'We can really change things, honest', visited Herr Goring's house in Munich earlier this morning. John Stewart, of the lack of pressure group HACAN'T said: 'Yes, we felt it was time to do something that would really persuade the government to stop its expansion plans at Heathrow. Herr Goring offered his sympathies to our case, and said he'd see what he could do.' And the protest group We're Plane Stupid also took direct action against Transport Secretary Ruth Kelly, by playing German brass band music through her letterbox when she wasn't there.

Mr Stewart added: 'OK, maybe playing music and wearing t-shirts isn't likely to change the minds of the government, or of multinational corporations, but a few Stuka attacks on the planned site and a couple of V2 rockets fired at Mrs Kelly's house will soon wake the blighters up!'

Local Liberal MP Vince Babble said: 'Well, never mind about the runway, let's talk about the demonstrators' legal rights, and avoid actually saying anything that might help.' And BAA chief Colin Matthews added :'Money, money, money!'

Hermann Goring said: 'But why not just fake a hijack, and crash a jet into the new runway when it's half-built? Ah, maybe not, you Britischers aren't that gullible. Maybe I'll have to send a few staffels over to bomb the place after all. Heil Braun!'

Eva Brown is 55.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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