Justin Lee Collins Charged With Affray After Attack On Hull City Fan

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Friday, 6 June 2008

image for Justin Lee Collins Charged With Affray After Attack On Hull City Fan
Bristol City 0 Hull City 1

Justin Lee Collins, the 'lifelong' Bristol City supporter and co-host of Channel 4's The Friday Night Project, has been charged with affray by police, after he was involved in an ugly incident on Wembley Way two weeks ago with Spoof writer and Hull City fan Monkey Woods.

The pair were at the New Wembley Stadium to watch their respective teams battle it out for a place in next season's Premier League - a battle Hull won 1-0.

Prior to kick-off, Collins was signing autographs for his fans, when he spied Spoof social commentator Woods, and made a beeline for him, swinging his effeminate fists as he went. Police moved in and arrested the Catweazle lookalike.

Eyewitness Tigers' fan Dick Turner, of Italy, said:

"I told Monkey that it would be funny if he walked over and panned the long-haired West Country gentleman but, before he had a chance, Mr Collins made the first move. By three seconds in, however, with the TV tramp writhing away on the deck, it was all over as a contest, and he was carted off by plod."

Mr Collins was bailed to appear at Harrow Magistrates Court on 23rd June, where he will doubtless receive sympathy and support from his fag friend Alan Carr.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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