The dog fancying community was apoplectic with grief, fear and outright confusion today upon hearing the horrific news that last year's winning dog and the bookies' favourite to reclaim the title this year - a North Vietnamese Wolfhound named Armande Fortesque Caviar Smythe III - had been mercilessly devoured by members of an as yet unnamed terrorist organisation.
The breeders of the prize hound, Ms. Edna Schidt and her life partner Ms. Frances Bhang, started their day like any other at the contest, by leaving their dog in the competitors' holding area to enjoy a light tapas breakfast with three bottles of wine. When they returned just half an hour later, all they found was a picnic blanket, a half-empty bottle of barbecue sauce and a copy of the Quran.
Terror cops were immediately brought in by organisers of the world famous dog/twat contest to scour the area for the cowards responsible, but it is believed that the culprits may have used their special terrorist invisibility capes to flee the scene. Co-ordinator of the investigation, Chief Inspector Horatio Spong, said, "It's one thing for these terrorists to go around blowing things up and babbling about Buddha or onions or whatever it is they believe in, but eating one of the best dogs this country has ever produced is just starting to take the piss."
The investigation continues.
