There have been approximately 230 sex-related deaths in the country within the past 6 months according to British Police.
It has been long suspected that sex was a dangerous thing by various sociologists, scientists and the Catholic Church.
During a Police interview Mrs Betty Swallocks had this to say: "It was horrible. One moment we were getting jiggy, the next his head suddenly exploded! It was the most horrific experience of my life!"
Similar incidences of "sexplosions" are being reported every day and an emergency handing out of chastity belts is in progress until enough Priests and fat people can be deployed to educate the British people in the ways of celibacy.
Until then you are warned to remain in your homes, wear your emergency chastity belts and at all costs avoid members of the opposite sex, pornography and contact your local Priest or single fat person.
Good luck.
