Written by Jesus Budda

Monday, 18 February 2008

image for Winston Churchill-shaped Sausage Worshipped by Hippy Commune
An uncanny resemblance to the fat man. Astonishing.

A 1lb pig meat sausage, which bears an uncanny resemblance to British Wartime leader Winston Churchill, is being hailed as a 'trippy hippy' idol by a cult of London-based pot smokers.

Nicknamed 'The Winston Weiner', devotees discovered the bizarre artifact in their local deli.

The cult believes that the universe was founded by Mother Nature and her three 'Earth Protectors" - Winston Churchill, Michael Caine and Mick Jagger. The sayings of these "three great men" form the cornerstone of their beliefs: get Hitler, get Carter; and get Pussy.
Because Churchill is dead - and because he so spectacularly achieved his 'goal' - the appearance of a sausage resembling him has attracted mass hysteria amongst the tie-dye clad believers.

The 'supernatural' appearance of the Winston Weiner has also created somewhat of a dilemma for the marijuana-loving cult: it's 4am and most of them have a bad case of the munchies.

"Winston means the world to us", said their glazy-eyed spiritual leader Mary Jane Splifftovski, "we'd never dream of eating him".

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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