Heathrow crash jet targetted by ecowarriors' railgun prototype

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 5 February 2008

image for Heathrow crash jet targetted by ecowarriors' railgun prototype
Symptoms of railgun exposure are being investigated

Heathrow Airport - (Taser Beam Mess): Last month's Heathrow jet crash landing may have been caused by an adapted taser-ray based on the Pentagon's railgun according to Anti-Terror cops monitoring airport expansion protesters.

The swing-wing Boeing 777 lost electronic control less than a mile from Heathrow and bellyflopped onto airport sidings narrowly missing a local housing estate scheduled for demolition to make way for Heathrow's controversial third runway.

Crash investigators are now probing what has been described as 'a blinding flash of lightning' emitted from a projectile sitting on one of the rooftops of the airport's flightpath.

The area has been consistently described by UK police as a haven for eco-nutters, Pentagon hackers and techno-geeks in the pay of Opus Dei-funded Scientology interests looking to bankroll their next 50 UK members of Parliament.

The January crash has now generated a mass class-action for trauma damages after aggrieved passengers complained of hypnotic-like effects following the disaster.

Many claim they have become electronic timebombs who now regularly disrupt high tech equipment through the power of thought.

MI5 has ordered a full investigation after it was pointed out that if crash survivors prove valid the results could be catastrophic for intelligence monitoring and security communications.

"Of course they could just as well be nuts," a spokesman said today.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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