Foot-in-the-mouth disease strikes the UK, yet again "Those dirty farmers don't know how to control their nobs," says Gordon Ramsay, British PM
Fresh from selling half-empty tubs of margarine, at only 7p a go, Gordon Brown (nee, Gordonio, King of the Sons of the Dessert) has declared a National Emergency of near national proportions.
"Those firkling farmers ought to stop shagging their damned sheep, the DIRTY BASTARDS" said El Gordo, Leader of the Daleks.
"If they can't stop their money-grabbing, subsidy-whingeing, potato-scarab infested minds from thoughts of pumping their muck into the ovaries of the Ovis, then I'm gonna have to do something drastic", said Lordy Gordy, Jehovah of Dumfries.
Thus, the Prime Minister has caused terror in the farming community by stopping the export of ALL farm animals, dead or alive, outside the UK whose keeper cannot prove that they have not had human farmer penis inserted inside either the anus or vagina of the animal.
Clearly, this is a task of mammoth proportions and some commentators say that Gordinho has set an impossible task.
"After all" said Kay Burley, newsreader of gorgeous proportions at Sky News (Da News that fells the trews) "Who the hell ever heard of farming folk not firkling the ferret with barnyard animals?"
Gordon Bennett is the new Prime Minister of Great Britain destined to be remembered as "The Farm Animal Shagger Killer"