Backlash Against Recycling Bin Expansion

Funny story written by Aisubeki Akiudo

Tuesday, 24 July 2007

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The Zen of Recycling

London Mayor Ken Lovingbone outlined plans yesterday for an expansion of the current recycling arrangements over all London.

At a press conference in Southall's Poundland shop, non-Nazi Ken expressed his excitement at the plans: "We plan to expand from the current three bin situation to a 84 bin recycling target. This will include pink bins for gay porn, yellow bins for unused egg yolk, and rainbow bins for unwanted soft toys figures for George, Zippy and Bungle the bear."

The Mayor further detailed the costs involved: "I would expect each household to pay a green-fee-tax of £37.29 per bin per week for the honour of saving the world from global cooling."

His announcement came after continual protests by residents against the current recycling programme in which many people were too think to figure out what to do. Shadow Mayor Pauline Fowler of Walford expressed her views on hearing the news: "Oooh when I was young, we didn't recycle. I fought in the war, you know. I'm 94. You bunch of complete bastards."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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