Brexit: Optimism Sprouts

Funny story written by Joel Kaye

Tuesday, 15 December 2020

image for Brexit: Optimism Sprouts
Fashion for the future

British sprout-growers are bullish at the prospect of a no-deal Brexit.

“As they’ll be able to get little else in the way of vegetables, what with tariffs and customs hold-ups at the ports, we’re going to be in the money,” said Terry Bull-Greenbullets, of British Sprout Cultivators. "Order early for Christmas!"

The Society of UK Flatulents shares the positive attitude of the sprout-growers. “Eating more sprouts will mean we shall be out and proud,” said Society secretary, F. Hart, “and giving vent to our innermost feelings. There’ll be no more talk of ‘mystery trombonists’. A wind of change is blowing.”

His wife, Fragrance, not a practising flatulent, commented, “They must remember they’re only allowed to gather in a maximum of six, and in the open air, with a stiff breeze blowing, it is to be hoped. Meanwhile, I’d stay up wind of them.”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!


Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot