Mrs Slocombe To Be Given A New Fanny At Glittering Ceremony

Written by Duff

Tuesday, 13 February 2007


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One of the prestigious Fannies being handed out tonight

Doyenne of British farce and smutty comedy, Mrs Slocombe aka Molly Sugden, is being awarded a fellowship this evening, at the prestigious Fannies ceremony to be held at London's swanky Dorchester hotel.

The Fannies, now in their second year, are a fairly new gong given to the great exponents of British double entendre and the guest list for tonight's show is a veritable who's who of smut and camp.

Last year's fellowship was awarded posthumously to the late great Sid James so Molly is indeed in exalted company.

The great woman herself gave us a few words:

Baps & Load
"This is absolutely fantastic and I am over the moon with this great news. I was just putting some butter on me baps when I felt felt something coming though my slot, causing me to nearly blow John Inman's load in my excitement. He was just putting some heaped spoonfuls of sugar in his tea do you see? He was staying with me for a week at the time.

Anyhow I trotted down the hall and picked the letter up and I was astonished. I haven't had anything as exciting as that for such a long time, my Bert's not what he was if you get my meaning?

My only concern is whether or not my pussy will be able to take all the excitement as I am unaccustomed to keeping it closed up for such a long period.

Captain Peacock was unavailable for comment as it is believed that he is now a virtual recluse, rarely emerging from his remote cottage in the Chalfonts.

Other nominees tonight are Leslie Phillips, Babs Windsor and Julian Clary.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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