The nation has collectively stated that it is willing to accept an additional holiday called 'Easter2' if David 'Jesus Jnr' Cameron is sacrificed.
The holiday would officially give the public a day to reflect on all the vital work that the current PM has done for this country. However, like all bank holidays, it will unofficially become another excuse for people to get rat-arsed, fall out with family members and crash Tinder by hitting 'like' to everyone.
The form of sacrifice is still open to debate with stoning, crucifixion and hanging all labelled as "a bit shit for 2014". The suggestion currently gaining the most backing involves TV coverage of a defenseless Cameron in an evacuated Eton against three armed NHS workers, with the phrase "we got you first", repeatedly scrolling across the bottom of the screen.
David Cameron insists that he is happy to sacrifice himself for the greater good, but more importantly the good of his people. Rumours surrounding the possibility of 'Easter 3' are quiet as Michael Gove is yet to put his name forward to replace Cameron.
