WARNING- Not for the religiously sensitive!!! God to the world- “He wasn't really my son! He was adopted!...................April Fool!” Jesus as he comes out of his tomb three days later- “That wasn't really me on the cross! It was some other guy I sold it to....................April Fool!” Judas to Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane- “I didn't really turn you in. I just pretended to be...
Jerusalem, Israel - A highly successful Ancient Judean hoax is coming full circle this weekend according to the author of a book about Christian subjugation to Jewish ritual cannibalism during the dark daze of the Roman Plague. Former Chief Rabbis...
Minneapolis, Minnesota ---- As part of its "population control program," discount retailer Targette, which has already equipped its stores with transgender bathrooms, "because," as the company's CEO, Brian C. "Big Bri" Cornhole, explained to star rep...
Cabo San Lucas, Mexico - Seven-year-old Johnny Dorrey and his little sister, Brook, were on spring break vacation with their parents, at a fancy resort in Cabo this week, when they thought they saw a familiar face, sitting under a beach umbrella, enjoying the sun and surf while relaxing with a big Pina Colada. The two children couldn't believe their eyes, and they plucked up the courage to go...
My priest, Monsignor Felix Fyodore Ayonsokopsosky, told me I should give up Fox News for Lent. "You have been acting very strange lately, my son. You need to quit watching Fox News. You look terrible. You smell worse than terrible. You've become paranoid schizophrenic. It's made you a cave dweller," Monsignor Ayonsokopsosky told me after confession. "But Father Ayonsokopsosky, Fox News has b...
Supermarkets in Scunthorpe have taken everything from their shelves, leaving only Easter eggs, according to our Northern correspondent. Hospital A&Es are bursting at the seams with chocolate gorged fatties according to NHS sources. Scunthorpe off...
The Archbishop of Cranbury has called on couples not to be left behind in the post-Easter mad scramble for bathroom suites and fitted kitchens. Major furniture and bathroom superstores have announced that pre-Easter stocks are robust, but that the su...
The nation has collectively stated that it is willing to accept an additional holiday called 'Easter2' if David 'Jesus Jnr' Cameron is sacrificed. The holiday would officially give the public a day to reflect on all the vital work that the current...
After finding a pile of white Archbishop robes in a skip, clergy have announced that the Archbishop of Canterbury and the majority of Canterbury related bishopry have crossed to the dark side. The Archbishop, whose very existence might have been...
The Atheist Society of Great Britain today announced that it will be organising street parties nationwide throughout the Easter period. Atheist Society spokesperson B.L. Zebub explained why to the alcohol sodden Church of England press corps. "Wel...
Forget Jesus Christ and all religious distractions, forget family meals and get togethers, once again according to T.V. advertising it's time to buy expensive furniture. Here's our guide for everyone out there with no common sense: 1) Buy the largest sofa you can squeeze into your room. 2) Forget comfort and other considerations. 3) Buy Mail order if possible for a surprise factor. 4)...
Pope Francis has announced on Twitter that he will be dressing up as a rabbit this Easter Sunday. "Il Mio Papa" commented earlier today that the Catholic Church has focused too much on the resurrection of Christ at Easter. "Easter is important fo...
A man dressed as the Easter Bunny was going to a meeting of those who were being hired by Macy"s to sit with children for photographs or to tour the store telling children about where the Easter Bunny was located and about five of them could work dif...
Pope Francis has stated that this year he will give up chastity, indulge in gluttony, and observe Lent by doing all the things he thinks about all year but never gets to do. In an unprecedented statement, the forward thinking pontiff explained that L...
Pensioner Pope Benedict XVI de-frocked 500 priests while in office, Vatican sources admitted. Vatican spokesman Federico Lombardi initially said the AP report was rubbish. The latest statistics reveal the number of priests defrocked in 2011 and 20...
Brussels - The Holidays and Holy Days Panel of the European Union has canceled Easter this year due to a lack of funding. "The Almighty, and I do use that name with a high degree of bitterness, refuses to perform a Resurrection this year," said Re...
Windsor - "Apparently it was looking for peanuts," Sir Pomfret Wetlocks, chief arsewiper to the Prince of Wales, tweeted this morning, "secreted in Camilla's favorite hideyhole." The furry little critter was then seen scurrying between the pews be...
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