Written by queen mudder

Monday, 23 October 2006

image for 'Cruise defects' as Scientology unveils new £24m London temple
New Scientology HQ buliding in City of London

Old Queen Street, City of London - (Associated Mess): The Vicar at St Andrew's-by-the-Wardrobe church, the Rev Alan Griffin, is staying tight-lipped following UK press reports that a famous Holywood celebrity film actor has defected to his parish church after failing to show up at yesterday's official opening of the Church of Scientology Centre next door.

The news comes after widespread rumours started by the South Park TV cartoon series showing Tom Cruise 'trapped in the closet' were confirmed by the actor's no-show at the Old Queen Street outing ceremony.

Rev Griffin's church is believed to be named after the parton saint of itinerant 13th century Karl Roving- troubadors, minstrels and merrie actors who sought refuge behind the vast portals of the Old Queen Street building's majestic erection whenever their thespian abilities were questioned.

Expect more details to emerge later this week.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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