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Funny satire stories about Scientology

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Funny story: Similarities Between Fox News/the Republican Party and the Church of Scamatology

Similarities Between Fox News/the Republican Party and the Church of Scamatology

Sociologists who examine cult phenomena have noticed similarities between the techniques of the Trump administration, the Republican Party, and Fox News: 1. They all illogically follow a leader who tells obvious falsehoods and is a blatant narcissicist and misogynist. 2. They both push books, supposedly instructive, that are loaded with bullshit. 3. The Trump administration and the "Chur...

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Funny story: Church of Scamatology Will Start Broadcasting New Network "Real Soon"

Church of Scamatology Will Start Broadcasting New Network "Real Soon"

Clearly Mental, FL As they have been promising and collecting "donations" for during the last three years, the Church of Scamatology promised they would be on the air with their new TV network "real soon." (If the past is any indication, could be any...

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Funny story: Leah Remini Abruptly Reverses Her Condemnation of Scientology

Leah Remini Abruptly Reverses Her Condemnation of Scientology

"King of Queens" star Leah Remini has fully recanted all the negative statements she recently made on A&E's "Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath", a program that criticized the religion for being devious, highly secretive and violent towar...

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Funny story: Elizabeth Floss Reveals Scamatologists Required to Use the F Bomb and Other Foul Language

Elizabeth Floss Reveals Scamatologists Required to Use the F Bomb and Other Foul Language

Hollyweed, CA Emmy winner Elizabeth Floss, who is a member of the Cherch of Scamatology, revealed that it is a requirement that all True Believers of the Xenu Story must use at, the minimun, at least one curse word per fifty extemporaneous words spok...

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Funny story: Trump Talks About How Science Enslaves People

Trump Talks About How Science Enslaves People

Podunk, ND Trump gave a speech today about how he had seen an HBO special in his hotel room about how people were being abused by Science. "On the HBO program I saw how Science had kidnapped people, and how they would make people disconnect from t...

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Funny story: Scamatology Running Out of Third World Countries to Recruit In

Scamatology Running Out of Third World Countries to Recruit In

Nukuʻalofa, Tonga According to the Tonga Police, in the last Third World outpost of the Cult of Scamatology, the cult has been ordered to leave the island immediately, and to release all the children they've managed to secrete away from the country. The cult has been unable to recruit anywhere in the world due to the unpopularity of their cult, the bad publicity given it by recent books, docume...

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Funny story: Scamatology Putting Out Call for New Celebrities Due to Exit of Jason Lee & Leah Remini

Scamatology Putting Out Call for New Celebrities Due to Exit of Jason Lee & Leah Remini

ClearlyCriminal, FL Scamatology has always used their celebrity members to promote the church. However, as they lose regular members (four times as many Britons claim they are Jedi Warriors, as opposed to Scamatology), so too are many of their celebr...

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Funny story: Scamatology to Merge With North Korea

Scamatology to Merge With North Korea

Clearlyclinical, FL North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un and Scamatology dictator David Makemerich (through a Scamatology spokeperson Karing Sow) made a joint announcement today when they confirmed the rumors that Scamatology will merge with North Korea...

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Funny story: Scamatology Head David Makemerich Asked to Star in Movie Blockbuster About Him

Scamatology Head David Makemerich Asked to Star in Movie Blockbuster About Him

Clearlydelusional, FL In startling movie news, Scamatology Head Cheese has purchased a large movie studio in the El Lay area to twin up with the other movie studio he bought a few years ago. The first movie announced by the new studio will be a b...

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Funny story: $camatology Leader Has Built Gigantic Ideal Org in North Korea

$camatology Leader Has Built Gigantic Ideal Org in North Korea

CLEARWATER, FL. The leader, or "pope" of $camatology has announced that a giant "Ideal Org," a giant church for the Church of $camatology, has been built by the inhabitants of one of the North Korean labor camps in North Korea's capital city, Pyongya...

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Funny story: Greta Van Susteren finds clarity

Greta Van Susteren finds clarity

WHITEWASHINGTON, DC - Scientologist and Fox News "hostess with the mostest," Greta Van Susteren cleared the air recently by challenging her male colleagues' belief in the natural superiority of men over women. "Have these idiots lost their minds?...

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Funny story: John Travolta Given $8 Million Dollars for NOT Making Battlefield Earth II

John Travolta Given $8 Million Dollars for NOT Making Battlefield Earth II

Hollywood, CA. John Travolta was promised at least $8 million dollars from the Kickstarter website, organized by John Travolta's fans to NOT make Battlefield Earth II as originally threatened. One million of the dollars came from the first movi...

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Funny story: Donald Trump to Buy Church of Scientology

Donald Trump to Buy Church of Scientology

New York, NY Donald Trump has announced that he has become a devotee of Scientology, auditing with his solid gold e-meter and expelling body thetans from his hair by the millions. "I absolutely love the Church of Scientology, what with all the c...

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Funny story: Justin Bieber and Beliebers Join Church of Scientology

Justin Bieber and Beliebers Join Church of Scientology

Los Angeles, CAJustin Bieber announced today that he took a personality test from some people he saw on Wilshire Blvd. and now he is joining the Church of Scientology. He will bring his many fans, dubbed "Beliebers," with him into the cult. "I kno...

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Funny story: Church of Scientology to Combine With Sears & Roebuck

Church of Scientology to Combine With Sears & Roebuck

Clearwater, FL The Church of Scientology and Sears & Roebuck have both had hard times in the last few years. Scientology has been having lots of members quit, and Sears has been having many old customers quit. "We feel that since we are both...

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Funny story: Tom Cruise to Ditch Scientology for Children of God

Tom Cruise to Ditch Scientology for Children of God

Tom Cruise announced today that he was quitting the Church of Scientology to join the Children of God. The Children of God, who also call themselves Family International or Family of Love, have long been known as kind of a Christian sex cult, who be...

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Funny story: Dick Cheney Joins Church of Scientology

Dick Cheney Joins Church of Scientology

Omaha, NE It was announced today that former vice-president Dick Cheney has joined the Church of Scientology and will attend Scientology classes at the Celebrity Center of Casper, Wyoming. He will be its only member (the church has also been trying t...

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