Second 'Staying Alive' fatality in as many days

Funny story written by Gary Potter

Sunday, 22 January 2012

image for Second 'Staying Alive' fatality in as many days
The Stayin Alive formation team

Following on from a previous story, a second fatality has arisen as a result of the Vinnie Jones 'Stayin Alive' resuscitation advert.

For those who haven't seen the advert, viewers are advised to compress the chest of the unconscious victim and depress the chest in time with the rhythm of the 70s disco classic.

Kirk St Moritz was the latest 'have a go hero' who wanted to test his new found first aid techniques out on a collapsed Amos Brearly, 67.

Said Moritz, "I saw the guy keel over by the bus stop and had to do something. I went home to change into my white suit, black shirt (open to the navel) and was looking around for a good 5 minutes for my medallion. By the time I got to the fella he was blue. They don't warn you about that kind of things in the ads."

A spokesperson for the new adverts released the following statement "We hadn't banked on the stupidity of the public as far as this was concerned. Grow up."

Paramedics have also been called to a scene at a HEE BEE GEE BEES tribute to the BEE GEES concert, where ironically 3 people suffered heart attacks during a rendition of 'Stayin Alive'. The band hand to restart several times to get all the first responders in sync.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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