Written by Ellis Ian Fields

Tuesday, 26 April 2011

image for Manchester United's Rooney To Be Subject To Schalke Winking Campaign
A nod's as good as a wink...

United's England star strike, Wayne Rooney, will face some unusual tactics in the European Championship quarter final tonight.

It has emerged that FC Scalke 04 players plan to wink at him throughout the match in an effort to put him off his game.

The winking is intended to remind him of Christiano Ronaldo's behaviour in the 2006 World Cup quarter final at Schalke's stadium in Gelsenkirchen.

Rooney was sent off for stamping on Ricardo Carvalho and Ronaldo famously winked at him convincing England fans that there had been some play-acting in the incident. England went on to lose the match on penalties.

A Schalke insider told us: "Oh ja, zat is right. Ze Schalke players hev decided zat ze vinking at Rooney is a gut vay to irritate him, to, how you say, 'get under ze skin.'

"He is known to be a volatile player, zo zere vill be much nictitating at him and all sorts of ze talking about ze grannies und ze call girls!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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