Wayne Rooney and his missus are being sued for 4.8 million, Rooney signs on the dole!

Written by Jaggedone

Tuesday, 2 February 2010

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Wayne Rooney has applied for social benefits, his baby needs nappies!

Rooney and his missus, Coleen, are being sued by a dubious marketing company to the sum of 4.8 million nicker!

Now as we all know Wayne, his missus and the baby are pretty well off, the only problem is, Roon is so pissed off he has decided to declare himself and his missus bankrupt. He actually went down the social last week to sign on for social security benefits, he didn't have enough bucks to buy nappies for the babbie!

His team mates at Man U have had a "whip round" and that should be enough till the end of the season. Nani was particularly generous (I wonder why?) and lent him his Ferrari to visit the social!

Now the big question is, what the fuck is happening to Roons ginormous salary?

Well the Glazier Bros (owners of Man U) have also helped "Roon", his salary is being booked off of the gigantic Man U debts weekly as an act of charity, in turn they are issuing Man U bonds and the money earnt from them is slipping into a backdoor Swiss Bank Account owned by his old mate Roger F*****R.

As for the court case, well you cant rip a "Roon" off with his pants down, can you (wink, wink)?

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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