Adebayor's celebration is nothing new

Funny story written by Football mole

Friday, 18 September 2009

Sheyi Emmanuel Adebayor's recent provocative goal celebration has justifiably caused a storm of debate across the sporting world, but his family and friends have now admitted that it was just a question of time before this ticking time bomb would go off so publicly.

Adebayor's mother, Mavis 87, gave a revealing insight into the young striker's behaviour.

She said: "He was a very popular boy at school and was always invited to the other boys' houses for birthday parties and such.

"But one year, he never went to any kid's parties and we couldn't figure out why until his own birthday came around.

"That morning, he was up and out of the house very early - before school - and we found out later that he'd gone round to all his friend's houses, slid along their front lawns on his knees with his arms outstretched, wildly celebrating his own birthday.

"We had to throw those trousers away!

"His friends and their parents were less than impressed I can tell you. One boy's father threw a shoe at him for stamping on some of his prize Dutch tulips!"

Adebayor's adolescence was regularly punctuated with similar behaviour but he was thought by many to have outgrown it by the time he turned out for French club Metz at the under-17 level.

However, the Adebayor of old resurfaced one turbulent night after the fledgling striker met a new lady friend.

A close friend who plays golf with the striker every Tuesday morning without fail, but who wishes to remain anonymous, takes up the story.

"He had a bit of a falling out with his girlfriend one time and when he met this new one he couldn't contain his excitement after they…erm, well you know (winks) for the first time!

"He went round to the old girlfriends place, slid on his knees with his arms outstretched on the front lawn shouting: "I've scored, I've scored!!"

"You'd have thought she'd be pleased for him but instead she just threw a plastic chair and an empty cola bottle at him. A passing traffic warden was injured but his friends seemed to be just as pleased as he was and they went off to wildly and provocatively celebrate elsewhere."

Gunner's boss, Arsene Wenger commented: "Emmanuel is a huge talent and I'm very pleased that he chose football over his other planned career path. I'm not so sure he would have had quite the same level of success as the Togo diplomatic attaché."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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