After the publishing of footballer Paul Gascoigne's poem to the recently deceased Sir Bobby Robson, members of the public have come forward and provided poems that Gazza has written in the past.
Literature experts Jack Tweed and Paris Hilton have read the poems and dubbed Gazza, 'the next Shaking-spear'. When asked if he thought Gazza's poems could be as big as William Shakespeare's 'Othello', and Shakespeare's sonnets, Tweed replied, 'I didn't know he played Othello, does he play it online?'.
Amazingly, one of the poems that was brought to the newspaper was written to Princess Diana after she died, one source said that Gazza and the rest of Britain 'Tried to move on after Diana's death but the News of The World have an article on it nearly EVERY FUCKING WEEK'.
'Updates from the NOTW about Diana include that she's dead, she's still dead and that it was probably Charles who caused the accident'. Of course this is not true as he was sleeping with Camilla at the time.
The poem by Gazza about Diana, entitled 'Crazy Royal Taxi', is as follows:
Diana, you are dead,
That rhymes with shed,
You are not on your death bed,
Because you are dead,
I might be thick,
But I am also sad,
I will kill Charles with a brick,
Because I am mad,
Even though I don't know you,
I suppose writing this is better than booze,
I'm sick of having my head in the loo,
But bulemia is one battle you sometimes loose,
I have forgot who you are,
Which is a shame,
Because I heard you died in a car,
If I don't finish this I'll get the blame,
I'll search for you on Wiki,
I think I've found who you are,
You were nearly as good as Ricky,
Martin - when you sang with the Supremes,
I'd kill Charles if I could find a mountain high enough,
And because of you I won't hurry love,
But you hurried, love,
And now you've crashed
To Princess Diana Ross, by Gazza.
