WASHINGTON, D.C. - White House Spokesperson Cal Colfax has just informed GOPolitical commentator Rush Limbaugh that his anti-President Obama remarks are beginning to sound very derogatory and offensive and that he better stop making them now, if not sooner.
Colfax stated that many voters are emailing the White House and stating that RL is beginning to sound a little like the leader of the Pocono Mountains' KKK Chapter Grand Wizard Dragon Jimmy Johnny "BubbaGuy" Fluffworthy.
Other emailers are wondering if perhaps Limbaugh is receiving funds from the Quasi-Nazi Party, which is headquartered in Pluma Del Pato, Argentina.
Colfax said that some of Limbaugh's rhetoric is basically comparing President Obama to Adolf Hitler which is stupid because Hitler was white and the president is only half white.
The White House spokesperson went on to say that it would be equally as stupid to compare the president to Rev. Al Sharpton since the president is only half black.
Limbaugh says that people have been unrelentingly hammering him ever since he made the remark that he wanted President Obama to fail. He says that he has been extremely hurt by the tens of millions of remarks saying that he is 'Un-American.'
The GOP mouthpiece contends that just because he badmouths the president of the United States, the Teletubbies, the Pope, the Sesame Street characters, Oprah Winfrey, and the Muppets does not make him a bad guy.
He said that highly opinionated people are sending him nasty letters, mean emails, and packages of sauerkraut.
He said that the other day, he received 9,348 emails from American citizens and three from Peruvians telling him that they would gladly pay for a one-way ticket to places such as Iraq, Peru, North Korea, Russia, Venezuela, and Wasilla, Alaska.
The White House has made it very clear that one Mr. Rush Hudson Limbaugh,III, had better back off with his anti-Obama ramblings or run the risk of having three things happen.
(1) He will be hit with a fine ranging anywhere from $4 million to $7 million.
(2) He will lose his political commentator's license or
(3) He will be imprisoned in a Federal Penitentiary for reportedly inciting his listeners to disrupt PETA meetings, food stamp offices, dreadlock salons, soul food drive thru windows, NBA ticket outlets, rap music concerts, and Harlem PTA meetings.
Calls to Limbaughs office have not been returned. But his next door neighbor Otto Von Helgenberger has said that (Rush) has already hired the services of famed derogatorial attorney Willie Tyrone Jefferson-Jackson.
Mr. Jefferson-Jackson was reached by phone and asked if he had in fact been hired to represent Mr. Limbaugh, he replied, "Yes, I be."
SIDENOTE: White House Spokesperson Cal Colfax was asked by a reporter for USA Today if there was any truth to the rumor that the President had asked the Attorney General to somehow find a way to put Limbaugh in the newly-established 95 percent tax bracket. Colfax grinned from ear-to-ear and replied with a "No tsk-tsk comment."
