The England cricket has been recalled by the ECB after their woeful display in the first test in the West Indies. The womens England team is been sent out the Caribbean to play in place of the male side.
The England team lost the match by an innings and actually made the third lowest total in test match cricket for 876 years.
A spokesman said " Quite frankly we're shocked how highly paid professional cricketers can perform to this standard. Therefore we have taken this unprecedented step to avoid further humiliation to the name of England cricket."
In the Caribbean commentator and ex-England captain Nasser Hussain could not control his anger "It's the third lowest total by England in test match cricket. I'm angry."
The team is not even to return to the hotel, they are to be placed on a raft and be told to row back to England. Captain Andrew Strauss will actually remain behind in order to wash the ladies team's kit. Someone at Lords said "He's not really even good enough for that."
Even as this news was breaking, a spokesman from the Government seemed to indicate that the teams British citizenship would be removed. Clearly this does not count for Kevin Pieterson as he is South African anyway.