Alonso Joins Reliant

Funny story written by Jools M

Monday, 5 November 2007

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Former world champion and best mate of Lewis Hamilton has sensationally quit the Maclaren team to join the fledgeling Team Reliant Robin. The acrimonious split with Maclaren was largely expected and Alonso had been linked with a possible return to Renault or even a move to Red Bull.

Both Teams declined to hire the Spaniard, however citing his exaggerated eyebrows as the reason stating that the required helmet modification might compromise the overall aerodynamic properties of their 2008 cars.

Reliant's Finnish boss (and former world champ) Nikki Haldekondleikken was enthusiastic: "We are delighted to have Fernando on board,and we are looking forward to seeing how the three wheel concept performs in the heat of battle. The Reliant is essentially unchanged from the iconic road car, sporting a classy three wheeled layout, and it also benefits from the use of fibre glass body panels which save weight.

"The team are now working on the engine which at present delivers a whopping 45 break horse power, and we are confident that with some modification we will get that up to around 49 bhp. However, with Fernando's skill and our significant weight advantage we should be mixing it with the Ferraris and Maclarens at the front of the grid"

Alonso is reported to have secured a lucrative package worth £19.50 per race with a win bonus of £11.25, rumors have also been circulating that should h win the championship in his first year with the team he could potentially scoop a bonus worth £98.70!

Fernando Alonso was unavailable for comment.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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