New Suspects In Woolmer Case

Funny story written by Leeane Hussey

Wednesday, 28 March 2007

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Jamaican Police Stumped By Lack Of Evidence.

Jamaican Deputy Police Commissioner, Mark Shields, is understood to be viewing new videotape evidence that he hopes will establish the identity of the suspects in the Bob Woolmer case.

Sources in the police department are concerned that there have been a spate of murders, first in the island of St Kitts & Nevis and then a mass murder reported at the Sir Vivian Richards Stadium in Antigua and Barbuda. Early reports suggest that the Australian cricket team in general, and their opening batsman Matthew Hayden in particular, have been murdering opposition attacks in recent weeks and that there appears to be no way of stopping the rampage.

The "Island News" has quoted Shields as saying "I cannot believe that, in such a peaceful community, these murderous attacks are unconnected. I have decided that I must watch all future coverage of the Australian World Cup games, especially in view of their recent, apparent massacre of the West Indian bowling attack. Watching all these games will be an onerous task but as head of the department I must take full responsibility."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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