BALTIMORE – (Sports Satire) – Back in September of 2021, Lila P. Festivus, bowled a perfect 300 game using a standard bowling ball.
Well now the 27-year-old sexy brunette has bowled another perfect 300 game, but this time using a standard regulation billiard ball.
The owner of the bowling lanes where Miss Festivus achieved her astounding feat said he’d never seen anything come even remotely close to that.
Sportswriter Pia Confetti with Sportsapalooza interviewed Miss Festivus, who said that she was afraid she was not going to be able to bowl the 300 game, since right before the fourth frame, she noticed that she started her period.
But like the trooper she is, Lila went into the womens bathroom, wadded up a bunch of paper towels, stuck them inside her yellow Size 6 Britney Spears string bikini thong panties, and continued the game.
SIDENOTE: The director of The National Women’s Traveling Bowling Exhibitionist League wants to hire Miss Festivus to go on tour all over the nation and in Mexico with the 5-woman troupe.
