Sir Steve McClaren, England supremo, and the man most tipped to be the greatest England manager of all time, called on Tony Blair to bring the troops in to help England in their fight to win the Word Cup for ever. The armed forces, currently serving in Iraq, and Afghanistan, have been put on high alert now that England strikers can't hit a barn door with a beach ball.
Major General Tufton Forelock was quick to provide backing for Sir Steve who has asked for everybody to get behind England with fervent over-optimism.
'Now, gather round men,' said the colonel in a speech that made the Duke of Edinburgh think of reaching for a servant. 'This is an important assignment, and it's going to be tougher for some of you than it will be for me.'
The Spoof would like to add, if you are having negative thoughts, stop it. They will be conveyed to our boys via a Deal or No Deal Cosmic Portal. Our boys need arrogance and over-confidence to crush the slimy foreigner. Put on your tin hat and call yourself Tommy. Now, isn't that better?