Harry Maguire Sustains Wrist Injury

Written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 10 September 2019

image for Harry Maguire Sustains Wrist Injury
Harry having his wrist examined earlier

Just when England needed him to stay fit, Manchester United centre-half, Harry Maguire, has reported he has sprained his wrist 'at home'.

He didn't elaborate any further.

Maguire, 26, has hardly been out of the news since his £80million summer move to Old Trafford from Leicester City, and this latest incident will do little to stem the enormous amounts of bullshit being written about him.

Speculation is rife about just how the Yorkshireman sustained his injury, with tens of thousands of comments on social media websites ranging from 'washing the pots' to 'waking up incorrectly' to 'walking the dog', although Maguire and his longtime girlfriend, Fern Hawkins, don't own a dog.

The sprained wrist is the second time Maguire has experienced an upper body limb injury, after having his palm greased in mid-July.

Manchester Royal Infirmary's Head of Onanism, Dr Rod Shuffler, said:

"We'll be keeping a close eye on him to make sure he doesn't aggravate it."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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