NASCAR's Danica Patrick Wants To Be Admired For Her Racing Ability and Not For Her Body

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 29 July 2013


The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

TARZANA - Danica Patrick flew into Tarzana to do some on the track promotional commercials at the world famous Gary Busey International Speedway.

While at the track she was interviewed by Buckaroo Kazoo with The Turnstile Review. He asked her how she was doing after bumping her head on a tree in the parking lot of Pompous Pizza Parlor in Pittsburgh last week.

The astoundingly svelte racer replied that she was fine and that the scratch had just about healed.

Kazoo asked her if she had decided on the offer to appear in a nude layout for PlayBubba Mens Magazine.

The 31-year-old Danica blushed and said that she was still thinking about it.

She was asked how much they had offered her. At first she was a bit reluctant to say but after some good-natured prodding she revealed that two weeks ago the magazine editor had offered her $900,000 but when he called her up two days ago he had upped her fee to $1.2 million.

Danica remarked that she would love to do the magazine spread but she really wants to be admired for her racing ability and not for having an extremely sexy body.

Kazoo blushed and asked her if he could put in his two cents on the matter.

"By all means Buck please do." Danica replied.

"Well the way I see it," Kazoo said, "every racing fan knows that you are a fantastic auto racer and they all admire you for that so the issue then is for you to just go ahead and tell the people at PlayBubba that yes you'll appear in a nude layout."

Danica smiled. She shook her head and asked Buckaroo if she could give him a kiss.

"Are you friggin kidding me! Yes! yes! hell yes!"

WRITER'S NOTE: Danica Patrick has promised that if and when she makes her final decision the first publication she will inform will be The Turnstile Review. -BUCKAROO KAZOO, The Turnstile Review.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more