Real Madrid has sensationally recouped all the £85million outlay on Welsh wonder Gareth Bale in less than 24 hours.
The canny Galacticos have charged 85,000 fans 500 euros to witness the press conference at the Bernabeu welcoming Bale. Each fan will also get a welsh-rarebit lunch and a Gareth Bale key-ring to raise 42,500,000 euros.
Another 100,000 fans who couldn't make the press conference have paid 100 euros for a Gareth Bale toe-nail clipper, match-day shirt, socks and pants to raise another 10 million euros.
50,000 lucky fans have paid a whopping 500 euros to have a fifteen minute brunch date with Gareth over the course of the season - raising another 25,000,000. The remaining 8.5 million euros were raised by selling photocopies of Bales medical, sachets of his blood and follicles of his hair and DNA.
A similar fundraising plan is now in place so Madrid can sign Wayne Rooney and Luis Suarez in January.