Written by IainB

Tuesday, 20 August 2013

image for Made-up United set for promotion, Imaginary Town to be relegated
Made-up United v Imaginary Town, a closer game than either set of fans believe

After the opening match of the season, Made-up United's magnificent two goal win over Imaginary Town has Made-up's fans looking froward to a promotion party at the end of the season.

"We were magnificent," said Dominic Fridge, a life-long Made-up United fan. "We completely dominated from start to finish. Imaginary stood no chance. I've already booked my hotel for Wembly."

Meanwhile, their opposition, Imaginary Town, are facing a long hard season according to Darius Constable, their super-fan.

"We've been struggling for years," he said, gloomily. "I fully expect us to go down this season, and that result only reinforces that belief. We were woeful. Yes, we hit the bar three times, their goalkeeper made five world class saves, we lost our star player early on to a knock, and they have the best striker in the league up front for them. But this doesn't detract from the fact that we were woeful."

Made-up's two goals, a harsh penalty and a deflected clearance hitting Billy Fish, Made-up's star striker on the back of the head and going in, are already both up for goal of the season, whilst Imaginary's fans don't expect that their team will score a single goal all season.

Alan Hanson, who watched the game as an impartial observer, cannot believe how the two sets of fans are reacting after just one game.

"I can't believe how the two sets of fans are reacting after just one game," said the Scottish soccer pundit with a crease in his forehead. "From what I've seen, Imaginary were a tad unfortunate, and on another day could have won 2-1. That's football. I expect both will be mid-table come the end of the season. Made-up have the slight edge, with Fish in the squad, as you know he's going to score goals. But then, what do I know?"

Football Psychologist, Henry Bottlemore, thinks that both sets of fans are behaving exactly as fans behave.

"After every win," he said, "the negative doom mongers shut up, so the only quotes you get are from the over-exuberant, whilst after a loss, the doom-mongers are the loudest voices, shouting I Told You All So from the roof tops. In reality, both types are wrong. I tried telling some of them once, I shan't bother again. Talk about selective selection! They not only see what they want to see and hear what they want to hear, they also smell and taste in a biased manner!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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