"I look any time to see someone's ass up there on my big screen", jokes one guy. "Seriously, this could be a mess."
Two More Hackers Sunday
Two more quick messages came through but apparently they weren't easy to understand. Many say one voice was a kids. Could be cable or satellite problems.
Hacker Interrupts Packers/Bears Game
"Old Cheese Heads Gonna Packer It In Today" came across the screen and those were the words according to the caption. How is hacking getting so easy?
Hacker took over BBC server, tried to 'sell' access on Christmas Day.
But "nobody bought it" as the saying goes.
Eleanor Roosevelt The Only One!
Eleanor Roosevelt was the only First Lady to have sex in a wheelchair. "We'd ride all over the White House in the early hours of dawn!" she said in her diary.
Joan The Moan Has Something To Really Moan About
Joan Rivers has confessed that all of her dozens of facial and body surgeries have caused her belly button to end up in her left ear.
Whoopi Goldberg Comes Clean
Whoopi Goldberg insists that her dreadlocks are real. She admits that her ears are fake; but her dreadlocks are real.
Honey Boo Boo Hit The Nail On The Head
Eight-year-old Honey Boo Boo recently stated that she does not like Megyn Kelly of FOX News because she's arrogant, she's sarcastic, and she's a fake blonde.
The Tattoo Did Look Kind of On The Odd Side
Jesse James says that he has so many tattoos that he never noticed that one on his back is a tattoo of a gay Chinese dragon.
Simple Simon (Cowell) Keeps It Simple
Simon Cowell has commented that he already has about 80 T-shirts for his future son.
True Facts From Snoops #1006
According to Snoops: Elvis Presley was ready "War And Peace" while on the commode when he died.
True Facts From Snoops #1055
According to Snoops: Tiny Tim was so small that P. T. Barnum often carried him around in his coat pocket, winning bets at the bars until they were both snockered. (I can make my pocket talk.)
India's Supreme Court reinstates law criminalizing gay sex
Hires NRA to help keep tabs on every citizen. (We already had it anyway. Could use the Cash)
This year's biggest Flop?
Obamacare Introduction! Who knows how Obamacare will go or if it will, but the intro was a total mess. So it staggers forward.
Paris Hilton Says She's One Of The World's Top 5 DJs
If she means Dipsey Joke, she could be right! Being rich can be sad if you have no talent. -Alice Cooper.
America Growing Even More Deeply Divided
"No it isn't! You're a lying sack of you-know-what and so is all your kind! Hope you all die a horrible death!", signed, The Other Side!
NSA 'spying on Europe-Asia undersea telecom cables'
"We admit that we spied on the cables but what we picked up showed that we were being spied upon", says NSA Spokesman.
NSA conflict a 'manufactured scandal'?
Was Washington trying to get attention away from Benghazi mess?
England To Abandon Cricket
'It's been a great four hundred years,' said England captain, Alastair Cook, 'but you've got to know when it's time to quit! I'm trying cycling, and the rest of team are learning other new sports.'
written by Swan Morrison, 29 December 2013
Second icebreaker ship on its way to trapped research vessel
Also, the first two rescue ice breakers which are also stuck. Already having trouble as Captain has tongue stuck to deck pole.
Duck Dynasty Back Together
Younger member of Dynasty admits that he is blood kin to J.R. Ewing.
Saudi Arabia gives $3 billion to strengthen Lebanese army
One billion is to be use for nose reduction in size so troops aren't so obvious.
Bipartisan skepticism after report clears Al Qaeda of Benghazi attack
"They wouldn't hurt a fly", says New York Times. Next: "There was no Benghazi attack?"
Icebreaker abandons rescue mission
Mission was to try and get Republicans and Democrats to at least LOOK at each other.
True Facts From Snoops #1122
According to Snoops: The lady who invented the "Lean Cuisine" products now weighs over 300 pounds!
True Facts From Snoops #066
According to Snoops: Oddly enough, the Electric Light Orchestra (ELO) is the all-time favorite rock band of the Amish!
True Facts From Snoops #1090
According to Snoops: The duck, Gladstone Gander, objects to A&E's rehiring of Duck Dynasty's Robertson!
True Facts From Snoops #1121
According to Scoops: The prisoners at Guantanamo have a higher standard of living that 99% of of Cubans.
Chinese President Xi Jinping dropped in unexpectedly at a traditional Beijing bun shop
Where he queued up, ordered and paid for a simple lunch of buns stuffed with pork and onions, green vegetables, and stewed pig livers, intestines and manure.
Britney Spears begins two-year Las Vegas gamble
Friends say that she may start performing on stage while she's there and win back her loses!
Wisconsin Teen Girl Eludes Cops in Chase, May Be Headed to California, Cops Say
"Then again, it might be Maine. But wherever it is she's going, we realize that she's on her way", says Captain.
Obama's presidency beset by s*its, farts in year 5
I'm sorry. That should be "Obama's presidency beset by fits, starts in year 5"
Feeling US snub, Saudis strengthen ties elsewhere #2
Ho Boy! Here comes the $10.00 per gallon price for gas!
Feeling US snub, Saudis strengthen ties elsewhere
Former President Oliver to Current President Hardy: This is another fine mess you have gotten us into.
VIDEO: 600 People Brawl Outside Movie Theatre.
Guy with torn lip, ear and black eye: Just 50 more and we would have broken the record.
'DUCK' Reunited!" #3
Next sermon: "Why the President is an Islamist pretending otherwise!"
'DUCK' Reunited!! #2
His next sermon title: "Let's Rid ourselves of all these illegal immigrants!"
Next sermon: "The Many Evils of TV Networks like A&E!"
Websites Now Selling Credit, Debit Card Information Stolen In TARGET Breach.
FBI Agent: "Hey! I have an idea. Why don't we purchase one and see who's selling them!" "Might bring a clue. Yep Yep Yep!!"
Man on meth fights off 12 cops while masturbating in bar.
Cop admits later that it's hard to masterbate and still catch a man on Meth!
Woman hypnotizes priest, steals church donations.#2
Priest: When I came to myself, I was doing crowing like a rooster!
Woman hypnotizes priest, steals church donations.
Priest: The last thing I saw was an beautiful naked woman.
Plus-size, double-chinned Barbie sparking controversial debate...#2
Makers say: Wait till they get a load of our 'Walmart Barbie" next year.
Plus-size, double-chinned Barbie sparking controversial debate.
Makers say that most Barbies today look like this one, not a scarecrow thin model!
Rabbi Sued After Baby's Penis Severed During Circumcision.
Rabbi banned from anymore circumcisions! Hiccups not defense.
DNC sends email defending Obama from impeachment possibility.
Presidents popularity now at all-time low!
First wave of recreational pot businesses in Denver get their papers
Now all we have to do is wait for the marijuana and we're redy to roll!
Va. town looks for ways to rid town of vultures
"We have 2,000 people here in Morton's Gap and 27 lawyers. Can anyone offer help?", asks Mayor.
The Biggest 2013 Bookseller Surprise?
It's 'The Big Book Of Amish Kama Sutra' or 'Now that there's no Electricity or TV or Computer, Let's Try This!'
Celeb News: Phil Robertson To Be Appearing On Duck Dynasty Despite Suspension
"He will still be suspended between shows", says A&E spokesman!
Cathedral, Synagogue and Mosque building Space Rovers in position
Sinners beware! Armies of Mosque, Cathedral and Synagogue building drones have completed buildings all over Mars, the Moon and Jupiter to foil attempts to establish permissive and free behaviour.
written by Auntie Jean, 29 December 2013
Donald Rumsfeld Plans to Kick Ass, Take Names this Spring
Asked what office he was going to run for he replied, "No office, just enjoy kicking ass and taking names!"
High blood pressure rates in Southeast's "Stroke Belt" remain unchanged
The Stroke Belt also known as the KFC Country! still stroking away!