New iPhone weight app hastily recalled

Funny story written by IainB

Friday, 17 September 2010

image for New iPhone weight app hastily recalled
Not suitable for weights above 154 grammes

Apple released their latest applelet for the iPhone called iWeigh, and then recalled it within five hours after a barrage of complaints.

Once the new applelet is downloaded onto the phone, the resistance of the screen can be used to weigh objects.

"Admittedly," said App designer, John Stobbs, "we only tested it using small items, such as cakes, and coins. It was very effective at this."

What Apple did not expect was that the vast majority of people who downloaded the applelet were trying to weigh themselves by standing on their phone screens. The designers have now withdrawn the applelet while they include a disclaimer about the maximum weight that can be weighed.

Paulette Small was one user who tried weighing herself, and is angling to get a new phone out of Apple. "I don't think a maximum weight disclaimer is going to be much use," she said. "After all, how do you know if the thing you want to weigh is over the limit without weighing it?"

With a lot of people seeming to want to weigh themselves with their iPhones, Apple are considering producing an applelet that will let owners do just this.

"We think," said Stobbs, "that if the owner jumps, then the accelerometer could be used to work out the force of the fall after the momentary weightlessness of apogee. However, somebody in our team seems to recall an experiment with a hammer and a feather. Apparently they hit the floor at the same time. He says this means everybody would fall at the same rate; but that's just ridiculous isn't it? We're looking into the physics of it."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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