Written by Skoob1999

Wednesday, 16 June 2010

image for Don't Worry - End Of The World At Least Three Years Away
Solar Storms Can Be A Bit Of A Bugger

NASA scientists were quick to reassure the world's population that we don't face imminent doom just yet.

We've got at least until 2013 before the brown stuff hits the fan.

The apparent problem is a cyclical increase in sunspot and solar storm activity, the onset of which could manifest itself in 2012. The resultant waves of electrically charged radiation could play havoc with electronic systems causing massive damage to our infrastructure.

We asked our science correspondent Izzy Einstein, who has a GCSE in Physics what the possible effects of such an event would entail?

"All the electronic stuff will probably crash," he told us. "Planes will fall out of the sky, hospital patients on monitors and stuff will probably receive electric shocks which make them fall out of bed, mobile phones will crash, computers won't work, the banking system and all computers will either crash or blow up, and them big flat screen tellies will burst into flames."

Other experts warned that people in skimpy summer clothing will probably get really bad sunburn with massive blisters, there'll be no cold beer in the pubs or supermarkets, sat-nav systems would cease to work leading to motorway carnage, there'll be black-outs for months, everybody will have to take a few months off work, there'll be no petrol, and no daytime TV. Summer temeratures in the UK could soar as high as 58C, apart from coastal areas where it will probably be a more comfortable 61C.

But aside from that it'll be pretty much business as usual.

Possibly with excessive levels of vuvuzela blowing.

So, that's all right then.

More as we get it. DON'T PANIC!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Topics: NASA, Earth, Solar Storm

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
49 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more