New Keyboards Announced for 2010 ICANN Standards

Funny story written by P.M. Wortham

Wednesday, 4 November 2009

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Hot on the news that internet domain names can now be created and registered in languages other than those based on Greek characters, Megakey Company has announced a new line of computer keyboards that accommodate five languages.

Based on the standard QWERTY keyboard most familiar to North American, South American and European continents, the Megakey keyboard will contain an additional 327 keys arranged in circumference around the existing layout. The key groupings will include Russian Cyrillic, Japanese Kanji, Chinese Hanzi, Arabic Script, and U.S. Redneck Phonetics.

The Redneck keyboard addition was perhaps the most controversial, not representing an actual language. ICANN representatives say that particular portion of Internet users, mostly attached to home shopping networks, make up more than 50% of all international web traffic.

Redneck keys include a new special character for "fixen", represented by Greek letters "F,X and N" merged together in script form, as well as "ya buddy", represented by a graphical upright thumb, to indicate "yes" in Redneck.

The keyboards measure 18 inches by 36 inches in dimension. New laptop configurations with the keyboard will require a carrying case about the size of a large pizza box.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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