In Rooster Flats, Tennessee yesterday, garage genius Stanley Fudpucker showed his prototype of a new car, the 12-squirreled Fink Mobile powered completely by common grey squirrels.
"I've already got Ford and Toyota interested" Fudpucker told reporters from as far away as Rascle Runs and Jasper in Sawbriar County. "It runs on twelve squirrels in these here four wheels, three squirrels per wheel, each placed in a corner of the frame."
The Fink Mobile will only carry two people but takes no fuel whatsoever except nuts and Fudpacker's secret ingredient. Fudpacker admits though that it is necessary to pull over and let the little fellers rest every 100 miles.
"Just think of what that could save you in a year's time," Fudpacker continued. "These little cars will cost you only $2500 and we'll stock you with squirrels to raise to replace the first batch. I've just returned from south Nashville where I talked to the Saturn people and they's interested too. They think they'll sell especially well in the south because of so many squirrels but we'd have to cancel squirrel season and change it to ground hogs."
Although Fudpucker would not reveal the secret ingredient which he adds to the squirrel feed that you order from his brother, Brother Fudpucker who owns a squirrel farm in Puddle, a close friend whispered "amphetamine sulphate".
