It's official! Women carry 4 times more germs than men!

Written by IN SEINE

Monday, 5 May 2008

image for It's official! Women carry 4 times more germs than men!
More germs than a toilet seat!

Following some detailed research by eminent microbiologist, Dr Mike Robe of Oxford University School of Biology, women carry 4 times more germs than men and some of them are potentially fatal!

He told In Seine News:

"It has long been thought that toilet seats carry the most bacteria of all and that's why girls insist that toilet seats are left down so that they do not have to touch them. However, there is one thing that often harbours up to 4 times more bacteria - the humble office computer keyboard..."

He added;

"… that the contents of the keyboard was often a reflection of what is in your nose and in your gut and that if somebody had a cold in your office, or even have gastroenteritis, you're very likely to pick it up from a keyboard; even STDs can be contracted. During my research, I had no choice but to condemn and quarantine a Dell that was only 4 months-old".

Dr Stephanie Streptococcus, a consultant microbiologist at University College London Hospital, told BBC 4's "Woman's Hour;

"Hospital keyboards are the worst offenders because so many nurses may be in contact with just one keyboard. E-Coli, C-Diff, Hepatitis C, MRSA and Herpes have all been found to be present and I recommend that keyboards are cleaned with a good disinfectant every week and are also used with disposable gloves. Because people often eat at the keyboard, cake and chocolate can get stuck between the keys thus providing an extra food supply for the bacteria. Probably the only way to avoid this is to get the new 'Holographic Infrared keyboards' where the image is projected on the desktop. However, it is not known whether these cause cancer or even if the frequencies used to transmit the image interfere with other hospital equipment. Besides, the NHS will not be able to afford the state-of-the art equipment for at least 5 years."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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