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Funny story written by David Johnson

Tuesday, 13 April 2004

Manchester, U.K. - University of Manchester scientists have completed research which suggests the evolutionary purpose of human fingernails. As part of the study, undergraduate volunteers were prevented from blowing their noses or manually removing accumulated secretions.

Within an average of 4 days, every volunteer had completely obstructed breathing. The Manchester scientists believe that primitive humans, devoid of handkerchiefs, used their fingernails to unblock nasal passages.

The Department of Comparative Behavior at the University of Manchester corroborated these preliminary conclusions, pointing out that all wild primate species routinely utilize fingernails for this form of rudimentary hygiene.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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