Contrary to all previous scientific evidence and indeed, all reason, the earth, it has been discovered, truly is powered by monetary force.
The amazing discovery was made by Dr Hans Grubelheist, who noticed an unusual "clinking, clanking sound" whilst he was observing plate tectonic movements in San Francisco.
Dr Hans states that the earth's core contains a large quantity of coinage which is constantly shifting, causing the world to turn.
This new finding has excited design theory creationists, who cite this as new proof that the earth was in fact created by an omnipotent deity. They now postulate that God was clearly using the world as a "really big piggy bank," and that "it sure as hell explains what the Grand Canyon is for."
However, they seem less clear as to what will happen when God wants to cash in his nest egg and finds the coins wont all fit out of the Grand Canyon, not matter how hard he shakes.
